My first call

So you know about how Belle came to be. Now for Belle’s first call. All I can say is I am surprised I made it past this call. It almost ended right there. My first lesson to be learned in this business I learned that night.

The driver picks me up. I have the driver meet me at Tim Horton’s, keeping my personal from the professional yet again. It is now that I learn that the agencies…..they just want your money. No concern for the situations they put you in. Another girl is in the car. I recognize her right away from the agency website. She is hot and from what I gather is their top girl.

On the way to the hotel to drop me off, the driver (who is the agency owner) fills me in on the guy I am supposed to be seeing. “He can be quite aggressive so be sure to stand your ground with him. He likes to take control and can be demanding. Just don’t take it from him”, are his words of advice to me.

The girl travelling with us asks the driver who I will be seeing and he tells her. Now if I wasn’t apprehensive before I certainly am now. The girl freaks on him saying how dare he send me to him my very first call!

I program the driver’s “check-in” number on my cell phone and I knock on the hotel door. A man answers. He is quite shorter than I am and I would say in his early 50’s. I size up him and the room feeling a little more confident in my ability to overtake him if necessary.

We chit chat some small talk and I make my safety call. All seems well and he mentions this being my first call. The agency had warned him when he called that they had no feedback on me as I had just started that day.

He asks me to undress very slowly in front of him, only revealing one piece of clothing at a time. The key to this, he said, was that I have to ask permission to undress. I am now feeling quite uneasy wondering how the hell I managed to put myself in such a situation. Fully naked he sits on the edge of the bed and tells me it is time I go down on him. Many complaints here as I am going too fast, too slow, not enough tongue……he obviously wasn’t pleased. Laying out on the bed he asks me if he can call me his “submissive B****”. Of course I have a problem with that and he doesn’t understand why. I won that fight as I made it clear I would leave if any such behaviour was presented.

He then asks if he can use nipple clamps, of course leading to another “absolutely not” from me. It was only an hour appointment and thank God. I had to ask permission to touch him, kiss him and so forth. I left feeling used and it was the most humiliating experience I have ever had. The driver dropped me off at my car and I just cried. I let him get to me and that was what bothered me the most, yet I think I needed that experience to make me aware of what I was getting myself into.

I am sure you are wondering just why I continued on after that appointment. I would like to say that I have an intelligent answer for that but I just don’t. I suppose it the beginning it really was all about the money. I knew I would have fun but to put up with that and accept payment afterward, yeah…it had to have been about the money.

Looking back on it now I am amazed that I overcame that. I think that was where I realized the extreme need to totally separate Belle from myself. I needed to protect my innerself from feeling that same humiliation. I had learned after that appointment that the girl in the car…..she had refused seeing this coward along with every other girl in the agency. If your most popular girls will not see this guy, just why would you send you newest and least experienced in to see him? Another lesson learned……agencies are all about the money.

Sitting in my van I called my dear friend that got me started in this. He met me right away and I just vented for what seemed like hours. He listened and that was what I needed. I know he felt personally responsible for what I went through so I assured him I would not allow that to happen to me again. I know I had 2 other appointments that night but unfortunately my first one had overshadowed the others and I am not sure how they went.

The positive at the end of the day? I was so worried that my first day I would not receive any calls and I did so in a way I exceeded my own expectations. As for the guy, he called for me again the week after. The agency didn’t tell me it was him I was seeing and this time it was a 2 hour appointment. I walked in the room and made it very clear what would and would not be taking place. He was much more gentle this time and even showed a little respect, although I am sure he was hoping for the meek Belle that showed up the week prior.

And there ya have it. Not the most pleasant experience but one that I think taught me a lot. I learned to stand up for myself and at 31 it was a needed lesson to be taught. My next entry you ask? Part of my transformation from being shy and conservative to finally feeling what it feels like to be wanted by a man. Overcoming my lack of self esteem to be able to accept that some might even find me a little attractive. Another great thing that all of you have done for me.