Role playing, as most of you know, is something I do not do. Yes, I am aware that I lose some business because of that restriction but it comes down to me not sacrificing myself for the sake of a dollar. It is just something I am not comfortable with and I think that some role-playing situations have the potential to be taken too far….a risk I am not willing to take. I was propositioned a while ago about a certain role playing scenario. After many emails we managed to script to every last detail how we could make this a mutually erotic event. After giving it some thought I decided to give it a try, only because it would involve another woman and I could even choose her! Acting is not one of my strong suits by any means and I made this gent aware of that but promised to do my best. I talked to an escort that I feel very comfortable with and I thought she would be perfect for what he was looking for (who will remain nameless as I feel it only respectful of her to do so). So here goes:
The Story Line:
My lover has just come back from a long 6 week business trip. We have been apart for quite some time and are so anxious to see one another again. We arrange to meet after I finish work the day his plane lands. I arrive at 6, still wearing my business attire and it just so happens that I bring a friend with me. Her and I have recently met, her just joining our firm but she has yet to meet my lover. Hmmm, wonder where things will go from here!.................
My girlfriend and I knock on the door. He opens the door and I jump into his arms to greet him with a hard passionate kiss. After minutes of embracing, our lips locked together I apologize to my girlfriend for not introducing her. “Jack, this is Angela, the lady that joined our firm while you were away, I hope you don’t mind but I invited her home with me to meet you”.
He greets Angela with a smile and a handshake and they say their hellos. I can see he approves of her slim body and beautiful blonde hair as he shows her into the living room. She takes a seat on the sofa as I remove my suit jacket and loosen Jack’s tie. Jack and I have a wonderful relationship which is based mostly on an equally balanced sexual appetite. I cannot resist placing my hands on his chest, wrapping my arms around him and showing him just how much I have missed him. He returns my kiss with great passion. We sit on the sofa, I in his lap and we do some catching up. Angela seems a little uncomfortable, feeling the sexual energy in the room and knowing that it is her presence that is holding us back. I have been taking about Jack’s homecoming for weeks and she knows how special I wanted our first night together at home to be. I am sure she is questioning why I would even think to invite her to our home tonight, knowing what I have had planned for some time.
She is shy and I have been trying to befriend her knowing how awkward it must be to be the “new girl” at the office. There is something that has attracted me to her, her sweetness or perhaps her innocence. Angela is very quiet yet has a certain curiosity in her eyes for adventure. Although quite reserved, I get the sense that this energy she feels around her is arousing. We chat about life, and while making conversation my hands begin to roam Jack’s body. I tease him with my fingertips, running them over his groin and between his thighs. We kiss between conversation and I open my legs for his hand to explore.
While his hands are focused on my body, he keeps his eyes focused on Angela. He certainly doesn’t want her to feel out of place but I know this is the greatest gift I could bring home for him. This is our dream, our fantasy and his innate desire. I giggle a little as I excuse myself to Angela, explaining that I need to loosen my man up some. He has had a long day of traveling and it’s time I make him a little more comfortable. I straddle him on the couch and begin to unbutton his dress shirt. “I am sorry for this Angela” he says, “She tends to get a little carried away sometimes”. Angela chuckles at his comment and although slightly embarrassed, she continues to watch as I undress.
His shirt undone, I run my fingers through the hair on his chest. The two of them continue to converse while I bring my lips to his neck. I whisper in his ear that I plan on seducing him in front of her. I felt him get hard beneath me. From there my tongue works down, tasting his sweat that has formed on his chest. I massage his arms as I begin to grind against him. I look to Angela and give a wink. She is enjoying the tease she is witnessing.
He again apologizes to her as I start to fiddle with his belt. “Isn’t he handsome?” I say to her as I work his zipper undone. She nods and giggles stating that he is a very nice man and I could have found no better. I ask her if she minds that I play with him a little and she nervously smiles. Angela says that she has never watched before and that it would be fun to do so.
His penis, now in my hand, oozes just a little when she says that. I work him with my fingers, stroking him gently and trying to relax him. He feels uncomfortable for Angela yet so turned on by having her watch. I slide my body slowly down his thigh, over his knee and to the floor. It is there, on my knees that I take him into my mouth. He tries to talk to Angela without breaking his train of thought but I know he won’t be able to much longer. She asks him if he likes it when I do that to him. He says it is so pleasurable to feel the heat from my mouth wrapped around him. He can feel himself swell as I take in his shaft inch by inch. She asks if she can watch us have sex. He smiles and I agree if it okay with him. Without any further questions, I slowly stand, take her hand and lead her into the bedroom. He follows close behind.
Angela takes a seat on the bench near the bed as Jack and I begin our undressing, he completely in the nude but I keep my bra and panties on. He likes to see me this way, to keep my undergarments on until he must have me. It is fun to know we have an audience, it adds a certain kind of erotica and I now see just why voyeurism is so sought after. Playfully I toss him back on the bed and straddle myself over top of him. There is no time for the soft lovemaking we are used to. This is sex, and it will be wonderful. Without feeling the need to hold back any longer I rest my body on his and make love to him with my lips. He thrusts his groin up to meet mine and we continue until I remind myself that there is a very hot sexy blonde that may appreciate a better view. I lift up on my knees to see if Angela is enjoying and Jack invites her to sit on the bed next to us. She readily accepts.
I move down his body to taste him again. I can see Angela, she wants to play too. I raise my eyebrows to her and smile as if to say “Go ahead and touch him”. As I work his shaft with my tongue I take her hand and place it on his chest. Stunned but very eager she slowly guides her fingertips through his chest hair and over his arms. I sit up and ask her if she has ever been kissed by a woman. She tells me that she didn’t even realize she had wanted to be until now. Jack rolls over to give us some room and I walk on my knees closer to her. I take her face in my hands, close my eyes and softly kiss her lips. Slow gentle kisses to be sure I make this a pleasurable experience for her.
I keep it slow and soft until she pulls away and opens her eyes. The eyes say everything and I know she enjoyed her first. With Jack watching, I lay her next to him and undress her. I kiss every part of her body that I expose but keep her as scantily clad as I, purely for Jack’s arousal! This is, after all, my gift to him.
I turn from Angela to him. I know she is comfortable with what is about to take place. I kiss him and take my tongue to where I left off. Surprisingly Angela follows. Her tongue touches mine and our eyes meet. She is hungry for me and for him. I close my eyes to fully be able to taste her lips and take in the thought of us both pleasing my man. He caresses her bottom so gently. With both of us on either side of him he has a wonderful view. Our bottoms in the air, we keep his hands quite busy. He moves our panties to the side of our lips and fingers just inside. After ensuring we are both wet for him we turn to share in a kiss. Panties and bras removed, it’s time we take this to the next level.
Both of us placing our pussies over each of his legs, we grind. We grind, we kiss and we explore each other’s bodies. I ask to watch the two of them become more intimate. Angela straddles him and slowly takes his head between her swollen lips. I bring my head down to her pussy and taste her sweet juices as she lowers herself onto him. I taste him, I taste her and I raise my pussy to his lips for him to taste me. We take turns her and I to please him. He has great stamina so I know he can take the pressure and not release until I am good and ready for him to. With her upright on him I raise myself to be upright against her. He is now left with the sight of my flowing hair down my back. I move with her body, pressing as tightly as I can against her.
I can feel her wetness mixing with mine and his fullness entering her. We kiss and continue to keep our lips locked until she lets out the most amazing moan. He head tilts back and I hold her steady as he pumps away at her. Her cumming will bring his release too. She has no control right now, her head still back I take turns with her nipples in my mouth. Holding her tight, I ride the wave with her. Harder and faster and then, there he is. He is there with her, in a place so wonderful as they come down from their glorious high.
Thinking it is done I slide myself off of him as she sits herself up. Then, feeling the need to have me pleased she lays me on my back and takes my sopping wet pussy into her mouth. With a very quick tongue lashing directly against my clit she takes me to that place in just a few short minutes. It is so amazing to me that this is her first time. She was sweet, she was passionate and together the three of us had a very erotic night together.
As I was leaving that evening Jack pulled me aside to say “Thank you”. It turned out that this was an experience that I didn’t even know I would enjoy as much as I did. No, “Thank you” I said, and that was it. A man I had never met before, and woman that I have never had sex with before. And in just a few short hours we created an experience that most outside couples could only dream of! It’s just amazing to me, so very amazing.
Tuesday, August 29, 2006
Tuesday, August 15, 2006
Sex for one
One of my favorite movies is City of Angels. Yes, I can cry just like the rest of ‘em when watching a sappy chic flick. This is a love story and any love story with Nicholas cage immediately becomes one of my favorites. He plays and angel of sorts who walks the earth, unable to be seen and brings those dying to the world beyond.
Long story short, he falls in love with an ER doctor, Meg Ryan. She is able to feel his presence, and she too falls in love with him. There is a scene in that movie that is in a bedroom. It is dark, the only light entering the room is the moon shining through the window. Meg feels him in the room with her as she lays herself on the bed. She is wanting him to touch her, to make wild passionate love to her.
Ever since watching this movie I have wondered, is it possible to bring yourself to that ultimate climax without ever being touched? Last night I had to put it to the test. Now perhaps only women will be able to relate to this experience as we are much more visual than men as a rule. It is not so much the actual touch of a man that arouses me as it is the look in his eyes while he is touching me.
I lay myself in my bed, completely naked with only a white sheet across my body and I let my mind wander. Trying to find a moment that I can place myself in. A time of passion that I can recall every breath of his on my cheek. A time when I am aware of how he smells, how his skin feels against mine and I can see the need for me in his eyes. And I find it, place myself in it and my journey has begun.
I will not allow myself to move my hands from beside me. There is no outer stimulation other than the sheet rested over me. I think of looking at him, his body hovering mine and I am gazing in his eyes. He has not entered me, we are just laying there feeling our bodies pressed together. I taste his lips, his tongue meets mine and we softly exchange kisses. So gentle, small moments of our lips just holding together and then passionate and hard anticipating what is about to happen. Then back to soft and gentle, not wanting to rush into the act but to savor what is happening between us right then.
My body begins to sway, left to right and slowly up and down my hips wanting to feel what I am envisioning. I know I have to focus so deeply on being there, not trying to be there or imagining what is was like. I have to be there, in that very moment.
I can feel how wet he has made me. As he moves his lower body over mine I feel that wetness. It is smooth, almost a silky feel and he is spreading it over my thighs. I press my hips into him and he slides his lower body up to meet mine. Again and again I feel him gently gliding his body across mine, each time feeling a more intense need for him to enter me.
I know I am wet, I can feel it oozing from my lower lips yet I cannot allow myself to feel nor taste. As I move my body, withering under the sheet I notice how lightly the sheet wisps over my clit. A wrinkle in the sheet, a crevice that I have found and I work my clit over it, the only physical stimulation I can feel outside of my vision.
I take myself back, not wanting to let myself lose the moment. I don’t want to think about laying in bed alone trying to recreate something that has happened. I have to make myself believe that it is all happening right now. My eyes are closed, I do not want to bring the outside world in. I am ready for him to enter me as his eyes tell me he can no longer wait for me.
The final time his lower body slides up mine he finds his way into me. No guiding him, his body knows its’s way. He has been here many times before. My legs spread just a little, enough to let him in but not completely. I love to feel myself open up to him. I look into his eyes and he returns my gaze. There is no need to say anything, it’s all said in our eyes. I smile to him, wanting him to know how wonderful he makes me feel. With each thrust he enters a little deeper but we keep it slow. I know that soon it will come to be that we can’t make it happen fast enough so I just allow myself to feel the anticipation of that moment.
My hands are now fists that have the sheet beneath me clenched tightly. How I ache to rub my hands through my thighs, make them wet and feel my swollen lips. This is an amazing feeling, to be so aroused, so close to climax and not have any outside stimulation to bring that on.
I am back with him, looking into his eyes. I tell him that I want to cum, but I don’t. I want so bad to feel that release but I don’t want to lose where we are right then. When I cum it is over, and I want this to last all night. He tells me he wants me to cum. I know he can feel when I do and that is an arousing feeling for him. He can feel me tighten inside as the muscles begin to contract, releasing all of that passion unto him. I am ready to let go.
I begin to wonder now if this will really happen. I am so ready to feel it, to let go but this aching need to touch myself has become overwhelming. Holding the sheet underneath me I rock my body up and down. I am thrusting my hips to the sheet over me, only barely feeling the light sensation it gives to my clit. A sweat has broken out and I can feel the sheet stick a little when I move. It is hot underneath and I am amazed the physical response to what I am experiencing in my mind.
We are no longer taking our time but in a need to reach our destination. He is holding out for me. He wants to feel me cum, that will bring him to his climax so I give myself to him. My arms wrapped under his and around his back I hold him tightly, using his back as leverage as I thrust my hips into him. Harder each time and I tell him I am there and as I close my eyes I know he is watching me as I orgasm. This excites him and as my body tightens, my inside walls pulsating all around him, I tell him to cum for me. His arms shaking, trying to hold himself above me, he thrusts deeper and deeper until he finally lets go too.
I can see his face. I watch him as he releases. Now I am there, I can feel it. It’s right there and I have to reach out to it. Harder and faster I rock myself up and down. The sheet below tight in my fists, my head raised slightly in the air and held back, my eyes rolling to the back of my head. The heat, the sweat, the moaning and the panting. I am there, it’s all a part of me…..and somehow, without touching myself from the time I lay myself onto the bed I let go.
I have never experienced and orgasm like that. It is not that it was any better than the best, just that it was different. Something I never thought possible, especially for me. I always have needed a lot of clitoral stimulation, usually light and gentle just to get aroused. To visualize a passion like that, so intense and erotic and to actually feel everything as though it were happening as I see it was an amazing experience for me.
Yes, an intense orgasm can be reached without any outer stimulation. It took much longer for me to reach that climax than if I had manually created that moment but the trying to get there was the best part of it all for me. The only down side to this experience? There was no feeling of him collapsing unto me. I missed having him roll onto his back, my head on his chest and his arms around me. This experience could never replace the real thing but at a time when the need is there but he is not, it’s a great alternative!
Long story short, he falls in love with an ER doctor, Meg Ryan. She is able to feel his presence, and she too falls in love with him. There is a scene in that movie that is in a bedroom. It is dark, the only light entering the room is the moon shining through the window. Meg feels him in the room with her as she lays herself on the bed. She is wanting him to touch her, to make wild passionate love to her.
Ever since watching this movie I have wondered, is it possible to bring yourself to that ultimate climax without ever being touched? Last night I had to put it to the test. Now perhaps only women will be able to relate to this experience as we are much more visual than men as a rule. It is not so much the actual touch of a man that arouses me as it is the look in his eyes while he is touching me.
I lay myself in my bed, completely naked with only a white sheet across my body and I let my mind wander. Trying to find a moment that I can place myself in. A time of passion that I can recall every breath of his on my cheek. A time when I am aware of how he smells, how his skin feels against mine and I can see the need for me in his eyes. And I find it, place myself in it and my journey has begun.
I will not allow myself to move my hands from beside me. There is no outer stimulation other than the sheet rested over me. I think of looking at him, his body hovering mine and I am gazing in his eyes. He has not entered me, we are just laying there feeling our bodies pressed together. I taste his lips, his tongue meets mine and we softly exchange kisses. So gentle, small moments of our lips just holding together and then passionate and hard anticipating what is about to happen. Then back to soft and gentle, not wanting to rush into the act but to savor what is happening between us right then.
My body begins to sway, left to right and slowly up and down my hips wanting to feel what I am envisioning. I know I have to focus so deeply on being there, not trying to be there or imagining what is was like. I have to be there, in that very moment.
I can feel how wet he has made me. As he moves his lower body over mine I feel that wetness. It is smooth, almost a silky feel and he is spreading it over my thighs. I press my hips into him and he slides his lower body up to meet mine. Again and again I feel him gently gliding his body across mine, each time feeling a more intense need for him to enter me.
I know I am wet, I can feel it oozing from my lower lips yet I cannot allow myself to feel nor taste. As I move my body, withering under the sheet I notice how lightly the sheet wisps over my clit. A wrinkle in the sheet, a crevice that I have found and I work my clit over it, the only physical stimulation I can feel outside of my vision.
I take myself back, not wanting to let myself lose the moment. I don’t want to think about laying in bed alone trying to recreate something that has happened. I have to make myself believe that it is all happening right now. My eyes are closed, I do not want to bring the outside world in. I am ready for him to enter me as his eyes tell me he can no longer wait for me.
The final time his lower body slides up mine he finds his way into me. No guiding him, his body knows its’s way. He has been here many times before. My legs spread just a little, enough to let him in but not completely. I love to feel myself open up to him. I look into his eyes and he returns my gaze. There is no need to say anything, it’s all said in our eyes. I smile to him, wanting him to know how wonderful he makes me feel. With each thrust he enters a little deeper but we keep it slow. I know that soon it will come to be that we can’t make it happen fast enough so I just allow myself to feel the anticipation of that moment.
My hands are now fists that have the sheet beneath me clenched tightly. How I ache to rub my hands through my thighs, make them wet and feel my swollen lips. This is an amazing feeling, to be so aroused, so close to climax and not have any outside stimulation to bring that on.
I am back with him, looking into his eyes. I tell him that I want to cum, but I don’t. I want so bad to feel that release but I don’t want to lose where we are right then. When I cum it is over, and I want this to last all night. He tells me he wants me to cum. I know he can feel when I do and that is an arousing feeling for him. He can feel me tighten inside as the muscles begin to contract, releasing all of that passion unto him. I am ready to let go.
I begin to wonder now if this will really happen. I am so ready to feel it, to let go but this aching need to touch myself has become overwhelming. Holding the sheet underneath me I rock my body up and down. I am thrusting my hips to the sheet over me, only barely feeling the light sensation it gives to my clit. A sweat has broken out and I can feel the sheet stick a little when I move. It is hot underneath and I am amazed the physical response to what I am experiencing in my mind.
We are no longer taking our time but in a need to reach our destination. He is holding out for me. He wants to feel me cum, that will bring him to his climax so I give myself to him. My arms wrapped under his and around his back I hold him tightly, using his back as leverage as I thrust my hips into him. Harder each time and I tell him I am there and as I close my eyes I know he is watching me as I orgasm. This excites him and as my body tightens, my inside walls pulsating all around him, I tell him to cum for me. His arms shaking, trying to hold himself above me, he thrusts deeper and deeper until he finally lets go too.
I can see his face. I watch him as he releases. Now I am there, I can feel it. It’s right there and I have to reach out to it. Harder and faster I rock myself up and down. The sheet below tight in my fists, my head raised slightly in the air and held back, my eyes rolling to the back of my head. The heat, the sweat, the moaning and the panting. I am there, it’s all a part of me…..and somehow, without touching myself from the time I lay myself onto the bed I let go.
I have never experienced and orgasm like that. It is not that it was any better than the best, just that it was different. Something I never thought possible, especially for me. I always have needed a lot of clitoral stimulation, usually light and gentle just to get aroused. To visualize a passion like that, so intense and erotic and to actually feel everything as though it were happening as I see it was an amazing experience for me.
Yes, an intense orgasm can be reached without any outer stimulation. It took much longer for me to reach that climax than if I had manually created that moment but the trying to get there was the best part of it all for me. The only down side to this experience? There was no feeling of him collapsing unto me. I missed having him roll onto his back, my head on his chest and his arms around me. This experience could never replace the real thing but at a time when the need is there but he is not, it’s a great alternative!
Monday, August 14, 2006
So what's next?
Just what do I aim for ahead? I have achieved so much more than I could have ever expected in this business. Yet I think it still has so much to offer me, and I so much more to offer to it.
But where do I go from here? I know that I have alot to learn of myself. I am just getting to know who I am through Belle. She has introduced me to a whole new innerself that I have searched for most of my young adult life. A connection has been made and now it is time to better strengthen that bond.
I hope in the future to continue the same journey that I began just a year ago. I know that there will be new paths and I am eager to travel them. I anticipate many wonderful things for Belle and hopefully a positive contribution to the escort industry as a whole.
I have many plans, ideas and ventures I am anxious to delve into. I hope that they are successful and enhance my journey. To stay neutral would only limit me and that is not my intention. I want to grow, both personally and professionally and in knowing that my time in this business will be short stayed it think it is time to take another step forward.
I am excited about this coming year but for many different reasons than I had a year ago. Then, for me, was an awakening of sorts. Sounds corny I know but that is truly what it had been. I have found in myself this energy and spirit that has made me feel alive again, now I can focus on channelling it to something greater. I now know that I can be successful in this business and I can do so by just being me. I feel confident about that, I no longer question if I am good enough to be one of them.
As this will be my last entry in the "First Year" series I just want to say thanks so much for allowing me to be me, accepting who I am and supporting all that I have chosen to do. I wouldn't be where I am without all of you. Cheers, to new beginnings, happy endings and experiences like no other!
But where do I go from here? I know that I have alot to learn of myself. I am just getting to know who I am through Belle. She has introduced me to a whole new innerself that I have searched for most of my young adult life. A connection has been made and now it is time to better strengthen that bond.
I hope in the future to continue the same journey that I began just a year ago. I know that there will be new paths and I am eager to travel them. I anticipate many wonderful things for Belle and hopefully a positive contribution to the escort industry as a whole.
I have many plans, ideas and ventures I am anxious to delve into. I hope that they are successful and enhance my journey. To stay neutral would only limit me and that is not my intention. I want to grow, both personally and professionally and in knowing that my time in this business will be short stayed it think it is time to take another step forward.
I am excited about this coming year but for many different reasons than I had a year ago. Then, for me, was an awakening of sorts. Sounds corny I know but that is truly what it had been. I have found in myself this energy and spirit that has made me feel alive again, now I can focus on channelling it to something greater. I now know that I can be successful in this business and I can do so by just being me. I feel confident about that, I no longer question if I am good enough to be one of them.
As this will be my last entry in the "First Year" series I just want to say thanks so much for allowing me to be me, accepting who I am and supporting all that I have chosen to do. I wouldn't be where I am without all of you. Cheers, to new beginnings, happy endings and experiences like no other!
Sunday, August 13, 2006
Belle's top 3 "Firsts"
A year of firsts. There have been so many of them. This past year has been a great adventure for me with some amazing events I never thought I would be a part of. I am risking a certain degree of criticism by writing this but I have also made it a commitment of mine to share part of Belle with you so I will continue to do that here with my top three firsts. (Not in any particular order as each was erotic in a class of itself)
1) I will put an end to a few inquiring minds by first commenting on my blog entry about an experience where I questioned to all of you, fantasy or reality. Yes, it was reality and what a reality it was.
The setting: A nice cozy room, 2 ample beds and just the right amount of lighting to figure out what belonged to who.
The characters: Myself, a gent I have had the pleasure of spending a great amount of time with this past year and yes, another gent that I have become very close to. (As a side note I have to mention that neither gent had met prior to this night)
The plot: 2 men and me and a great deal of choreography mixed with imagination. We had planned on this meet for some time, both wanting to give to me my fantasy. Plenty of testosterone but not more than I could handle. My heart pounding and an arousal like no other. A fantasy of 2 men pleasing only me, attentive to my desires.
The conclusion: Wow. An amazing experience that could not have been planned any better. It was not like how you see it in the movies. It was not porn, it was real…oh so real. One of the most erotic encounters I have or likely ever will be a part of.
2) Feeling a woman’s kiss, tasting her sweet body, caressing her smooth skin and fondling her wonderful breasts. This year was a first for all of that for me. Again, an experience like no other. To run my hands through her hair, and feel her wet lips pressed against mine was another fantasy come true. A touch so different than a man’s, so soft and gentle. And the beauty to have had the chance to experience so many different forms of this fantasy keeps me yearning for the next. Another erotic first.
3) I wrote in a blog entry some time ago of my fantasy, yet a very simple one of sorts. To experience a certain passion that I have never been a part of before. To look into a man’s eyes and feel his need for me, like a hunger that needs to be fed. I think every woman has a desire to be wanted like this. To feel like there is no other he would want to be with. He must have me and I must have him. It is a need, no longer a want. I have now felt that need, that passion, that desire. It is addicting, very much like a drug. I could never describe what it feels like without taking away from the experience. I can only hope that all of you have that chance if not now then at some time in your life to feel that. I won’t need to describe it to you, you will know if and when you have felt it. Totally and completely euphoric, it leaves you wanting more. Another erotic first!
1) I will put an end to a few inquiring minds by first commenting on my blog entry about an experience where I questioned to all of you, fantasy or reality. Yes, it was reality and what a reality it was.
The setting: A nice cozy room, 2 ample beds and just the right amount of lighting to figure out what belonged to who.
The characters: Myself, a gent I have had the pleasure of spending a great amount of time with this past year and yes, another gent that I have become very close to. (As a side note I have to mention that neither gent had met prior to this night)
The plot: 2 men and me and a great deal of choreography mixed with imagination. We had planned on this meet for some time, both wanting to give to me my fantasy. Plenty of testosterone but not more than I could handle. My heart pounding and an arousal like no other. A fantasy of 2 men pleasing only me, attentive to my desires.
The conclusion: Wow. An amazing experience that could not have been planned any better. It was not like how you see it in the movies. It was not porn, it was real…oh so real. One of the most erotic encounters I have or likely ever will be a part of.
2) Feeling a woman’s kiss, tasting her sweet body, caressing her smooth skin and fondling her wonderful breasts. This year was a first for all of that for me. Again, an experience like no other. To run my hands through her hair, and feel her wet lips pressed against mine was another fantasy come true. A touch so different than a man’s, so soft and gentle. And the beauty to have had the chance to experience so many different forms of this fantasy keeps me yearning for the next. Another erotic first.
3) I wrote in a blog entry some time ago of my fantasy, yet a very simple one of sorts. To experience a certain passion that I have never been a part of before. To look into a man’s eyes and feel his need for me, like a hunger that needs to be fed. I think every woman has a desire to be wanted like this. To feel like there is no other he would want to be with. He must have me and I must have him. It is a need, no longer a want. I have now felt that need, that passion, that desire. It is addicting, very much like a drug. I could never describe what it feels like without taking away from the experience. I can only hope that all of you have that chance if not now then at some time in your life to feel that. I won’t need to describe it to you, you will know if and when you have felt it. Totally and completely euphoric, it leaves you wanting more. Another erotic first!
The men that make me
A few weeks into the business and everything was great. Many calls, compliments and stellar reviews. Each visit is different from the last. Different personalities, different likes and dislikes but all in all a great time. Now, one year later and I have had an amazing opportunity to explore sex from many different angles…..literally. I hate using the term “Client” or “Customer” especially when I am referring to gents that I see on a regular basis. I know it sounds a little over the line but I do prefer to call them friends so that is what I shall do.
My first regular gent was one of the first to respond to me when I started posting on the boards. He was very supportive, encouraging and always willing to answer any questions I may have had. We first met just a week or so into my venture and we continue to meet a year later.
He is very soft spoken, and surprisingly single. Always respectful, we are able to engage in wonderful conversation…..about life in general and the goings on in the business. He has befriended many of the ladies and the guys on the boards and has become our “knight in shining armor” of sorts. I think he has a great sense of what us women endure in the course of a day and a respect for the business. We spend a lot of time emailing one another, chatting in the chat rooms and of course some one on one play time when our schedules allow it. A very good friend who truly respects me and what I chose to do with my life.
Then there is another friend who has never failed to lift me when things have me down. He never misses an opportunity to compliment me, encourage me and thank me for what I have brought to his life. It is uplifting to know that I somehow play a positive role in someone’s life after our time together has ended. That is what this is all about for me. Yes, it can be a sleezy business if that is how you choose to conduct yourself. But when you take the time to take something spiritually from the experience it makes it that much more rewarding. I need to know that what I provide for them makes them feel good and changes their life even if in some small way. This man never hesitates to share those changes with me, to let me know that our time together means something more to his life than just simply a sexual experience.
It is friends in the business that have helped me to see the changes in myself before I have noticed them myself. They see a sense of confidence in me that I have never had in my life. One gentleman said that he could not believe my confidence walking into the room knowing that I was fairly new to the business. I knew starting out that I had to appear that way when first meeting a client. It was imperative to my safety that I showed I was not to be easily taken advantage of. Being able to display that strong sense of self even though I didn’t feel it allowed me to eventually grow into becoming just that…..confident and strong. Again, them giving to me so much more than what I could possibly give to them.
It may be hard to believe for some of you that there are times I look so forward to meeting with someone.. Yes, this is a business but I am still as human as the rest of you. To know that I am about to meet with someone willing to give themselves to me in a most passionate way is an exhilarating feeling. These experiences are few and far between but allow me to be a part of something that I yearn for in my personal life yet I know I have no room for. That is the beauty of the balance I have created. To live the romance and passion, to feel the urgent need to be naked aside one another yet comforted in knowing that it is safe, for both of us. We know where our boundaries lie. While our thoughts may wander over, our understanding of what we share keeps it in perspective. For that time we are together we are one, sharing a time that some are not able to be a part of in a lifetime. It is intimacy in the greatest form and I have truly come to be ever so grateful to be a part of that.
So to all of the friends that I have met, to all of you that have been able to let yourself go and give to me as I try to give to you….thank you. It has been a wonderful year of great memories and I eagerly anticipate what still lies ahead.
My first regular gent was one of the first to respond to me when I started posting on the boards. He was very supportive, encouraging and always willing to answer any questions I may have had. We first met just a week or so into my venture and we continue to meet a year later.
He is very soft spoken, and surprisingly single. Always respectful, we are able to engage in wonderful conversation…..about life in general and the goings on in the business. He has befriended many of the ladies and the guys on the boards and has become our “knight in shining armor” of sorts. I think he has a great sense of what us women endure in the course of a day and a respect for the business. We spend a lot of time emailing one another, chatting in the chat rooms and of course some one on one play time when our schedules allow it. A very good friend who truly respects me and what I chose to do with my life.
Then there is another friend who has never failed to lift me when things have me down. He never misses an opportunity to compliment me, encourage me and thank me for what I have brought to his life. It is uplifting to know that I somehow play a positive role in someone’s life after our time together has ended. That is what this is all about for me. Yes, it can be a sleezy business if that is how you choose to conduct yourself. But when you take the time to take something spiritually from the experience it makes it that much more rewarding. I need to know that what I provide for them makes them feel good and changes their life even if in some small way. This man never hesitates to share those changes with me, to let me know that our time together means something more to his life than just simply a sexual experience.
It is friends in the business that have helped me to see the changes in myself before I have noticed them myself. They see a sense of confidence in me that I have never had in my life. One gentleman said that he could not believe my confidence walking into the room knowing that I was fairly new to the business. I knew starting out that I had to appear that way when first meeting a client. It was imperative to my safety that I showed I was not to be easily taken advantage of. Being able to display that strong sense of self even though I didn’t feel it allowed me to eventually grow into becoming just that…..confident and strong. Again, them giving to me so much more than what I could possibly give to them.
It may be hard to believe for some of you that there are times I look so forward to meeting with someone.. Yes, this is a business but I am still as human as the rest of you. To know that I am about to meet with someone willing to give themselves to me in a most passionate way is an exhilarating feeling. These experiences are few and far between but allow me to be a part of something that I yearn for in my personal life yet I know I have no room for. That is the beauty of the balance I have created. To live the romance and passion, to feel the urgent need to be naked aside one another yet comforted in knowing that it is safe, for both of us. We know where our boundaries lie. While our thoughts may wander over, our understanding of what we share keeps it in perspective. For that time we are together we are one, sharing a time that some are not able to be a part of in a lifetime. It is intimacy in the greatest form and I have truly come to be ever so grateful to be a part of that.
So to all of the friends that I have met, to all of you that have been able to let yourself go and give to me as I try to give to you….thank you. It has been a wonderful year of great memories and I eagerly anticipate what still lies ahead.
Thursday, August 10, 2006
Keeping humble
After my first review the phone started to ring. For the first several weeks it rang non stop. And then there were more great reviews. And more phone calls. It was so exciting and humbling. I was amazed that a woman of my nature could possibly compete with the other beautiful ladies that were offered to them. I have never been so complimented in my life. Nor have I experienced that kind of passion, even in my own personal relationships. It was flattering but I could never let it go to my head. I still blush when I am told how much someone enjoys my company.
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“I decided to see Belle. She’s new and I haven’t seen any reviews, but a friend recommended her, her pics were really hot and I’ve always had good luck with (Agency name edited).She arrived on time wearing tight black pants and looking like a million bucks. This lady is really attractive. Got introduced over a glass of wine, very confident and friendly, and was really enjoying a nice conversation when Belle gets up, walks over to my chair, and as she begins unbuttoning things, says, “We’re wearing way too many clothes.” It was very quickly solved and WOW! What a great body. I could have easily spent the rest of the session just oogling this eye candy but somehow we ended up in bed and here the real fun began. Belle is maybe the greatest kisser I’ve met. Her dfk for those who are into serious foreplay is out of this world. My tonsils are bruised! Well, after some detailed exploration of this new gorgeous female terrain I ended up at the diner for one of the tastiest servings of daty I’ve encountered. Judging from her vocal and physical response, it’s more than apparent that Belle is particularly appreciative of gourmet dining as well. Each course just seemed to get better. Next a delirious serving of bbbj with bls on the side. All I will say about this entrée is that just thinking about it is producing a cold sweat! On to even more energetic daty, followed by more mind blowing bbbj, and just when I didn’t think I could take any more, a cover was produced which Belle deftly applied with loving attention. She mounted up and rode this cowboy into delirium! Sadly at this point my time was up but I’m sure msog is standard menu. Anyway Belle had a quick shower, we dressed, and talked some more until we were politely reminded by her driver that our hour had ended ten minutes ago. I had a great time, with a classy lady who I will definitely see again. Get to the phone boys, I think Niagara has a new star! And thank you Belle, you are a treat!
Decided to see somone new and opted for Belle as she seemed really interested in providing great service from her posts on the board. All I can say is WOW. She is very genuine and fun to be with. I think she enjoyed our session as much as I did. The foreplay was incredible, very sensual and passionate lady.
I saw Belle yesterday and say "Ditto" to everything Floater said. Belle was a pleasure to be with and one of the best times I've ever had with a SP.
WOW. That one word summarizes the most amazing experience I have ever had in my hobbying career. And that experience was with the beautiful Belle from (Agency name edited). I am sitting here, the day after our first encounter, and I still can't wipe the grin off my face (or get the feeling back in certain areas of my body!) I am no novice to the hobby. But Belle, by far, is the most complete woman I have ever encountered in this business. She is the girlfriend or wife we would all love to have - beautiful, fantastic personality and an absolute dynamo in bed! There is NOTHING - I repeat - NOTHING I would change about Belle. (except maybe that she was with me 24 hours a day).I will not go into the play-by-play of our activities as that would ruin the special time that Belle and I had together. Suffice it to say she is the ultimate GFE and is one of the most talented and energetic woman that I have ever encountered. She will leave you breathless and begging for more.Guys, I think I may be ruined for any other woman in this business. I feel like a man who has been roaming the dessert in search of water and found an oasis, an oasis named Belle. And the more I drink to quench my thirst, the more I need. And I do need more Belle. I think anyone who spends time with her will definitely feel the same way! Thank You Belle for a Glorious Afternoon - the first of many!!!!!
It is funny reading these reviews one year later. But they are a reminder of why I do what I do and why I have the clients that I do. Those pictures were a reflection of who I am and the experience I want. Passion and class, truly a GFE experience.
I hear it all the time, guys posting about how we are all it for the money. It frustrates me that some feel that way and I can only hope that my clients don’t feel that way about our time spent together. Do I orgasm every time? No. Do I enjoy each and every experience I have? No. But I do my best to take something positive away from every visit. If it didn’t go so well then I question why and I try to learn from that. I think to walk away with only the money would be shortchanging myself an opportunity to learn more about myself and others around me.
Yes, the money has afforded me the opportunity to do so much more in my life but money can’t buy the chance to finally get to know me, to please me and do for me things I never dreamed possible.
Tomorrow will be all about my favorites. No, I will not discuss the people that are my favorites as I feel that would violate them in a way but I will describe my favorite experiences and why they are what they are.
***********************************************************************
“I decided to see Belle. She’s new and I haven’t seen any reviews, but a friend recommended her, her pics were really hot and I’ve always had good luck with (Agency name edited).She arrived on time wearing tight black pants and looking like a million bucks. This lady is really attractive. Got introduced over a glass of wine, very confident and friendly, and was really enjoying a nice conversation when Belle gets up, walks over to my chair, and as she begins unbuttoning things, says, “We’re wearing way too many clothes.” It was very quickly solved and WOW! What a great body. I could have easily spent the rest of the session just oogling this eye candy but somehow we ended up in bed and here the real fun began. Belle is maybe the greatest kisser I’ve met. Her dfk for those who are into serious foreplay is out of this world. My tonsils are bruised! Well, after some detailed exploration of this new gorgeous female terrain I ended up at the diner for one of the tastiest servings of daty I’ve encountered. Judging from her vocal and physical response, it’s more than apparent that Belle is particularly appreciative of gourmet dining as well. Each course just seemed to get better. Next a delirious serving of bbbj with bls on the side. All I will say about this entrée is that just thinking about it is producing a cold sweat! On to even more energetic daty, followed by more mind blowing bbbj, and just when I didn’t think I could take any more, a cover was produced which Belle deftly applied with loving attention. She mounted up and rode this cowboy into delirium! Sadly at this point my time was up but I’m sure msog is standard menu. Anyway Belle had a quick shower, we dressed, and talked some more until we were politely reminded by her driver that our hour had ended ten minutes ago. I had a great time, with a classy lady who I will definitely see again. Get to the phone boys, I think Niagara has a new star! And thank you Belle, you are a treat!
Decided to see somone new and opted for Belle as she seemed really interested in providing great service from her posts on the board. All I can say is WOW. She is very genuine and fun to be with. I think she enjoyed our session as much as I did. The foreplay was incredible, very sensual and passionate lady.
I saw Belle yesterday and say "Ditto" to everything Floater said. Belle was a pleasure to be with and one of the best times I've ever had with a SP.
WOW. That one word summarizes the most amazing experience I have ever had in my hobbying career. And that experience was with the beautiful Belle from (Agency name edited). I am sitting here, the day after our first encounter, and I still can't wipe the grin off my face (or get the feeling back in certain areas of my body!) I am no novice to the hobby. But Belle, by far, is the most complete woman I have ever encountered in this business. She is the girlfriend or wife we would all love to have - beautiful, fantastic personality and an absolute dynamo in bed! There is NOTHING - I repeat - NOTHING I would change about Belle. (except maybe that she was with me 24 hours a day).I will not go into the play-by-play of our activities as that would ruin the special time that Belle and I had together. Suffice it to say she is the ultimate GFE and is one of the most talented and energetic woman that I have ever encountered. She will leave you breathless and begging for more.Guys, I think I may be ruined for any other woman in this business. I feel like a man who has been roaming the dessert in search of water and found an oasis, an oasis named Belle. And the more I drink to quench my thirst, the more I need. And I do need more Belle. I think anyone who spends time with her will definitely feel the same way! Thank You Belle for a Glorious Afternoon - the first of many!!!!!
It is funny reading these reviews one year later. But they are a reminder of why I do what I do and why I have the clients that I do. Those pictures were a reflection of who I am and the experience I want. Passion and class, truly a GFE experience.
I hear it all the time, guys posting about how we are all it for the money. It frustrates me that some feel that way and I can only hope that my clients don’t feel that way about our time spent together. Do I orgasm every time? No. Do I enjoy each and every experience I have? No. But I do my best to take something positive away from every visit. If it didn’t go so well then I question why and I try to learn from that. I think to walk away with only the money would be shortchanging myself an opportunity to learn more about myself and others around me.
Yes, the money has afforded me the opportunity to do so much more in my life but money can’t buy the chance to finally get to know me, to please me and do for me things I never dreamed possible.
Tomorrow will be all about my favorites. No, I will not discuss the people that are my favorites as I feel that would violate them in a way but I will describe my favorite experiences and why they are what they are.
My first photo shoot
Ok, my first week has come and gone and I have survived. Now it is time to put some pictures up because let’s face it…….not too many are willing to set up a sexual encounter with a woman sight unseen. The agency owner typically does the girls photo shoots but I had a real problem with that. I asked if it would be okay if I submitted my own and he was okay with that.
Once again I call my friend and ask his help. He is very computer savvy so I know that editing my pics will not be a problem. Not that I wanted them to look unlike me but just some touching up. So he booked a room for us to use for the shoot. We planned on making this an all day event as I knew it would take some time to loosen up to the camera.
Close to 7 hours we spent in that room and walked away with about 4 pictures out of the 400 that were taken that I would allow to be posted on the agency’s web site. Just how do you “look sexy” when asked to do so? What does sexy look like? I took some time to search many agency line-ups trying to see just how I should pose and what I should wear. This is when Belle’s persona was born.
I had to think about just why I was getting into this business. Then I had to ask myself how to go about getting out of this experience just what I am looking for. My life prior to escorting was safe. It was comfortable, predictable and safe. I lacked the passion that every woman desires. I yearned for a man to wrap me in his arms, kiss me ever so passionately and make me feel like he wants no other. It is funny because I have come to learn that that is exactly what most hobbying men out there do this for too. But how do I relate that through my pictures?
Lying naked with my legs spread is just not my thing. I did not want to exploit myself or appear to be desperate. I think that some things should be left to the imagination. I have never tried to hide that my body is not perfect but also show confidence that I love my body. For the first time in my life I accept me for who I am and would only want the gentlemen that would be seeing me to feel the same.
My first set of pictures were very conservative. It is difficult to show some of you but not all of you, appear sexy but not sleezy and all the while knowing that your smile does you no good as it will be plastered with pixels anyways!
My pictures done, I walk out of the room with a disc of 4 pictures. Not bad for 7 hours I thought! I downloaded them to my computer to post on the review boards and forwarded them to the agency. While waiting for them to finally get them up on the site I made my first post with my picture.
Not too much activity on the boards lately so I thought I'd create a little something to talk about. OK Boys and Girls, you asked for them so here they are! Little time to get some great shots done but hope these will do for now. (Have to leave some things to the imagination!) I'll be booked on for Tuesday and Wednesday from 2pm till 2am at (Agency and owner's names edited) so give them a call for bookings or feel free to PM me anytime. Here's to having a great time getting to know all of you... *** Hugs and Kisses, Belle ***
And then I sat and waited. I called my photographer and sat on the phone about 2 hours and I kept refreshing the page telling reciting to him just how many people had seen me naked. The thought of knowing that people are sizing me up, comparing me to other women was a very uneasy feeling at first. Of course I have gotten used to it now and it no longer bothers me but it did take some getting used to.
And that was my first week. One bad call and a 7 hour photo shoot. Now I just had to wait and see if the phone would ring. To my surprise it did, and quite often but I will save that for tomorrows post!
My first call
So you know about how Belle came to be. Now for Belle’s first call. All I can say is I am surprised I made it past this call. It almost ended right there. My first lesson to be learned in this business I learned that night.
The driver picks me up. I have the driver meet me at Tim Horton’s, keeping my personal from the professional yet again. It is now that I learn that the agencies…..they just want your money. No concern for the situations they put you in. Another girl is in the car. I recognize her right away from the agency website. She is hot and from what I gather is their top girl.
On the way to the hotel to drop me off, the driver (who is the agency owner) fills me in on the guy I am supposed to be seeing. “He can be quite aggressive so be sure to stand your ground with him. He likes to take control and can be demanding. Just don’t take it from him”, are his words of advice to me.
The girl travelling with us asks the driver who I will be seeing and he tells her. Now if I wasn’t apprehensive before I certainly am now. The girl freaks on him saying how dare he send me to him my very first call!
I program the driver’s “check-in” number on my cell phone and I knock on the hotel door. A man answers. He is quite shorter than I am and I would say in his early 50’s. I size up him and the room feeling a little more confident in my ability to overtake him if necessary.
We chit chat some small talk and I make my safety call. All seems well and he mentions this being my first call. The agency had warned him when he called that they had no feedback on me as I had just started that day.
He asks me to undress very slowly in front of him, only revealing one piece of clothing at a time. The key to this, he said, was that I have to ask permission to undress. I am now feeling quite uneasy wondering how the hell I managed to put myself in such a situation. Fully naked he sits on the edge of the bed and tells me it is time I go down on him. Many complaints here as I am going too fast, too slow, not enough tongue……he obviously wasn’t pleased. Laying out on the bed he asks me if he can call me his “submissive B****”. Of course I have a problem with that and he doesn’t understand why. I won that fight as I made it clear I would leave if any such behaviour was presented.
He then asks if he can use nipple clamps, of course leading to another “absolutely not” from me. It was only an hour appointment and thank God. I had to ask permission to touch him, kiss him and so forth. I left feeling used and it was the most humiliating experience I have ever had. The driver dropped me off at my car and I just cried. I let him get to me and that was what bothered me the most, yet I think I needed that experience to make me aware of what I was getting myself into.
I am sure you are wondering just why I continued on after that appointment. I would like to say that I have an intelligent answer for that but I just don’t. I suppose it the beginning it really was all about the money. I knew I would have fun but to put up with that and accept payment afterward, yeah…it had to have been about the money.
Looking back on it now I am amazed that I overcame that. I think that was where I realized the extreme need to totally separate Belle from myself. I needed to protect my innerself from feeling that same humiliation. I had learned after that appointment that the girl in the car…..she had refused seeing this coward along with every other girl in the agency. If your most popular girls will not see this guy, just why would you send you newest and least experienced in to see him? Another lesson learned……agencies are all about the money.
Sitting in my van I called my dear friend that got me started in this. He met me right away and I just vented for what seemed like hours. He listened and that was what I needed. I know he felt personally responsible for what I went through so I assured him I would not allow that to happen to me again. I know I had 2 other appointments that night but unfortunately my first one had overshadowed the others and I am not sure how they went.
The positive at the end of the day? I was so worried that my first day I would not receive any calls and I did so in a way I exceeded my own expectations. As for the guy, he called for me again the week after. The agency didn’t tell me it was him I was seeing and this time it was a 2 hour appointment. I walked in the room and made it very clear what would and would not be taking place. He was much more gentle this time and even showed a little respect, although I am sure he was hoping for the meek Belle that showed up the week prior.
And there ya have it. Not the most pleasant experience but one that I think taught me a lot. I learned to stand up for myself and at 31 it was a needed lesson to be taught. My next entry you ask? Part of my transformation from being shy and conservative to finally feeling what it feels like to be wanted by a man. Overcoming my lack of self esteem to be able to accept that some might even find me a little attractive. Another great thing that all of you have done for me.
The driver picks me up. I have the driver meet me at Tim Horton’s, keeping my personal from the professional yet again. It is now that I learn that the agencies…..they just want your money. No concern for the situations they put you in. Another girl is in the car. I recognize her right away from the agency website. She is hot and from what I gather is their top girl.
On the way to the hotel to drop me off, the driver (who is the agency owner) fills me in on the guy I am supposed to be seeing. “He can be quite aggressive so be sure to stand your ground with him. He likes to take control and can be demanding. Just don’t take it from him”, are his words of advice to me.
The girl travelling with us asks the driver who I will be seeing and he tells her. Now if I wasn’t apprehensive before I certainly am now. The girl freaks on him saying how dare he send me to him my very first call!
I program the driver’s “check-in” number on my cell phone and I knock on the hotel door. A man answers. He is quite shorter than I am and I would say in his early 50’s. I size up him and the room feeling a little more confident in my ability to overtake him if necessary.
We chit chat some small talk and I make my safety call. All seems well and he mentions this being my first call. The agency had warned him when he called that they had no feedback on me as I had just started that day.
He asks me to undress very slowly in front of him, only revealing one piece of clothing at a time. The key to this, he said, was that I have to ask permission to undress. I am now feeling quite uneasy wondering how the hell I managed to put myself in such a situation. Fully naked he sits on the edge of the bed and tells me it is time I go down on him. Many complaints here as I am going too fast, too slow, not enough tongue……he obviously wasn’t pleased. Laying out on the bed he asks me if he can call me his “submissive B****”. Of course I have a problem with that and he doesn’t understand why. I won that fight as I made it clear I would leave if any such behaviour was presented.
He then asks if he can use nipple clamps, of course leading to another “absolutely not” from me. It was only an hour appointment and thank God. I had to ask permission to touch him, kiss him and so forth. I left feeling used and it was the most humiliating experience I have ever had. The driver dropped me off at my car and I just cried. I let him get to me and that was what bothered me the most, yet I think I needed that experience to make me aware of what I was getting myself into.
I am sure you are wondering just why I continued on after that appointment. I would like to say that I have an intelligent answer for that but I just don’t. I suppose it the beginning it really was all about the money. I knew I would have fun but to put up with that and accept payment afterward, yeah…it had to have been about the money.
Looking back on it now I am amazed that I overcame that. I think that was where I realized the extreme need to totally separate Belle from myself. I needed to protect my innerself from feeling that same humiliation. I had learned after that appointment that the girl in the car…..she had refused seeing this coward along with every other girl in the agency. If your most popular girls will not see this guy, just why would you send you newest and least experienced in to see him? Another lesson learned……agencies are all about the money.
Sitting in my van I called my dear friend that got me started in this. He met me right away and I just vented for what seemed like hours. He listened and that was what I needed. I know he felt personally responsible for what I went through so I assured him I would not allow that to happen to me again. I know I had 2 other appointments that night but unfortunately my first one had overshadowed the others and I am not sure how they went.
The positive at the end of the day? I was so worried that my first day I would not receive any calls and I did so in a way I exceeded my own expectations. As for the guy, he called for me again the week after. The agency didn’t tell me it was him I was seeing and this time it was a 2 hour appointment. I walked in the room and made it very clear what would and would not be taking place. He was much more gentle this time and even showed a little respect, although I am sure he was hoping for the meek Belle that showed up the week prior.
And there ya have it. Not the most pleasant experience but one that I think taught me a lot. I learned to stand up for myself and at 31 it was a needed lesson to be taught. My next entry you ask? Part of my transformation from being shy and conservative to finally feeling what it feels like to be wanted by a man. Overcoming my lack of self esteem to be able to accept that some might even find me a little attractive. Another great thing that all of you have done for me.
Tuesday, August 08, 2006
Belle is 1 this week!
Happy Birthday Belle! Yes, Belle is 1 this week. It has been a year since venturing into this wild and crazy but oh so fun adventure. In reading my blogs I have referred to escorting as many things but if anything, it has truly been a wonderful adventure.
This week my blogs will be all about my past year. I know I have written a lot about individual experiences but now I would like to share with you the things that I have learned, not only about the business but about myself.
I am sure some of you will be able to personally relate to things I have to say because it is you who have been a big part of getting me to where I am today. I will do my best to keep my references anonymous and I apologize if you take offence to me opening up about all of you. Again, not wanting to intrude on your privacy but to make you aware just how you have all affected me.
A year ago I sat on my front porch with a dear friend of mine discussing sexual experiences and my desire to be with a woman. It was that conversation that led me here. This wasn’t something that I jumped into feet first. I researched the prospect. I contemplated the ramifications and I questioned if this was something I could do. The question I asked myself most was “Is this business for me”?
I am not sure just where I found that answer but I know that for the first time in years I felt excited, even overwhelmed at the thought of awakening my sexual spirit. But these women, I thought, are so beautiful! They are young, their bodies firm, their breasts so supple. Just how could I compare? So this is how my first week prior to my first appointment went.
First it was reading the review boards. Being completely removed from the adult entertainment industry my entire life I have to say that the abbreviations took some getting used to. I would call my mentor many times asking to fill me in on this foreign language. Abreviations understood, it was now time to see if there was a place for me out there. And so went my first post.
“For some time I have been considering becoming an SP, more seriously in recent weeks. I am curious to know from a gentleman's perspective what he likes to see in an SP. I understand YMMV but just a general perspective as I have some concerns, primarily a small chest size (although good things come in small packages) and evidence of child bearing (which on the positive side denotes experience!). I have an adventurous personality and love to be in the company of gentlemen. Just not sure what to expect or where to go from here, any helpful feedback would be appreciated. Thanks in advance.
I remember thinking :What the hell are you doing”! It just seemed so crazy to me, I had never thought that this would be my desire in life. Then the replies start coming. Words of advice and encouragement from so many in the hobby. The just of it all? Basically, be yourself and have fun! That is what they all said. Just be myself and have fun. I can do that!
So then it was deciding what to do from there. I had decided that this was something I wanted to try out, now I had to decide which agency to work for. Again, it was the advice of the boards that led me to the agency I chose. So I made the call. It was awkward, I had no idea what to say so I wrote it out ahead of time.
“Hi, my name is……”. Wait, what is my name? Do I give my real name? No, I have to make one up. Because I had posted on the boards using the name “Sleighbelle” it was just suiting to shorten it to Belle. It was at that moment that Belle was born. The phone rings and a man answers. I give him my real name. So much for being in control. We agree to meet the next day at Tim Horton’s.
So there I sat in the front seat of his car. I have to say that this is the most awkward interview I have ever been to. It’s not the usual questions like : “Where do you see yourself in five years?”, but instead it was more like “Just what are you willing to do?” and “Are you a GFE?”. I showed him my identification to prove my legal age and he asked me for my stats. I had no idea so he sized me up and wrote some numbers down. I told him I could start in a couple of days and that was it. I was hired. No waiting for a phone call or more interviews. I was now officially an escort.
I went home and posted on the board:
First I'd like to say thanks again to all of the ladies and gents for your replies and pm's. I met with ********* today and am excited to say that as of next Tuesday I will start booking on with their agency. My schedule will be a little up in the air for the first couple of weeks but much more flexible after Labour Day weekend. Next week I will be booked on for Tuesday and Wednesday 2pm till 2 am........so who's gonna take one (or 2 or 3) for the team???? LOL.Looking forward to meeting everyone and having a great time!(Pics are soon to follow)
Looking back now, a full year later and it all just seems so funny to me. The shyness that had inhibited my life seems such a distant part of me now. The insecurity I harbored about my body has been replaced with contentment. For the first time in my life I feel comfortable just being me. I have learned through this business to accept the person that I am inside and out. A lesson that I could not have learned on my own. You have given to me much more than I could ever give to you.
Life is a journey and it we tend to take a few wrong turns along the way. But in each wrong turn I think we learn a little of ourselves. I have found the strength to stand up for myself. A new found confidence within that I am so grateful for. I can’t say what the next year will hold for me but something tells me that it will only get better from here.
Next entry: My first appointment. Ugh!
This week my blogs will be all about my past year. I know I have written a lot about individual experiences but now I would like to share with you the things that I have learned, not only about the business but about myself.
I am sure some of you will be able to personally relate to things I have to say because it is you who have been a big part of getting me to where I am today. I will do my best to keep my references anonymous and I apologize if you take offence to me opening up about all of you. Again, not wanting to intrude on your privacy but to make you aware just how you have all affected me.
A year ago I sat on my front porch with a dear friend of mine discussing sexual experiences and my desire to be with a woman. It was that conversation that led me here. This wasn’t something that I jumped into feet first. I researched the prospect. I contemplated the ramifications and I questioned if this was something I could do. The question I asked myself most was “Is this business for me”?
I am not sure just where I found that answer but I know that for the first time in years I felt excited, even overwhelmed at the thought of awakening my sexual spirit. But these women, I thought, are so beautiful! They are young, their bodies firm, their breasts so supple. Just how could I compare? So this is how my first week prior to my first appointment went.
First it was reading the review boards. Being completely removed from the adult entertainment industry my entire life I have to say that the abbreviations took some getting used to. I would call my mentor many times asking to fill me in on this foreign language. Abreviations understood, it was now time to see if there was a place for me out there. And so went my first post.
“For some time I have been considering becoming an SP, more seriously in recent weeks. I am curious to know from a gentleman's perspective what he likes to see in an SP. I understand YMMV but just a general perspective as I have some concerns, primarily a small chest size (although good things come in small packages) and evidence of child bearing (which on the positive side denotes experience!). I have an adventurous personality and love to be in the company of gentlemen. Just not sure what to expect or where to go from here, any helpful feedback would be appreciated. Thanks in advance.
I remember thinking :What the hell are you doing”! It just seemed so crazy to me, I had never thought that this would be my desire in life. Then the replies start coming. Words of advice and encouragement from so many in the hobby. The just of it all? Basically, be yourself and have fun! That is what they all said. Just be myself and have fun. I can do that!
So then it was deciding what to do from there. I had decided that this was something I wanted to try out, now I had to decide which agency to work for. Again, it was the advice of the boards that led me to the agency I chose. So I made the call. It was awkward, I had no idea what to say so I wrote it out ahead of time.
“Hi, my name is……”. Wait, what is my name? Do I give my real name? No, I have to make one up. Because I had posted on the boards using the name “Sleighbelle” it was just suiting to shorten it to Belle. It was at that moment that Belle was born. The phone rings and a man answers. I give him my real name. So much for being in control. We agree to meet the next day at Tim Horton’s.
So there I sat in the front seat of his car. I have to say that this is the most awkward interview I have ever been to. It’s not the usual questions like : “Where do you see yourself in five years?”, but instead it was more like “Just what are you willing to do?” and “Are you a GFE?”. I showed him my identification to prove my legal age and he asked me for my stats. I had no idea so he sized me up and wrote some numbers down. I told him I could start in a couple of days and that was it. I was hired. No waiting for a phone call or more interviews. I was now officially an escort.
I went home and posted on the board:
First I'd like to say thanks again to all of the ladies and gents for your replies and pm's. I met with ********* today and am excited to say that as of next Tuesday I will start booking on with their agency. My schedule will be a little up in the air for the first couple of weeks but much more flexible after Labour Day weekend. Next week I will be booked on for Tuesday and Wednesday 2pm till 2 am........so who's gonna take one (or 2 or 3) for the team???? LOL.Looking forward to meeting everyone and having a great time!(Pics are soon to follow)
Looking back now, a full year later and it all just seems so funny to me. The shyness that had inhibited my life seems such a distant part of me now. The insecurity I harbored about my body has been replaced with contentment. For the first time in my life I feel comfortable just being me. I have learned through this business to accept the person that I am inside and out. A lesson that I could not have learned on my own. You have given to me much more than I could ever give to you.
Life is a journey and it we tend to take a few wrong turns along the way. But in each wrong turn I think we learn a little of ourselves. I have found the strength to stand up for myself. A new found confidence within that I am so grateful for. I can’t say what the next year will hold for me but something tells me that it will only get better from here.
Next entry: My first appointment. Ugh!
Saturday, August 05, 2006
Name calling
Whore:
A prostitute.
A person considered sexually promiscuous.
A person considered as having compromised principles for personal gain.
Prostitute:
One who solicits and accepts payment for sex acts.
One who sells one's abilities, talent, or name for an unworthy purpose.
Slut:
A woman considered sexually promiscuous.
A woman prostitute
Courtesan:
A woman prostitute, especially one whose clients are members of a royal court or men of high social standing.
Escort:
One or more persons accompanying another to guide, protect, or show honor.
A man who is the companion of a woman, especially on a social occasion.
A person, often a prostitute, who is hired to spend time with another as a companion.
Sticks and stones may break my bones but names will never hurt me. It is the reality that when one thinks of a woman of my profession, the above comes to mind. We are demeaned, ridiculed and shrugged off by society. It is wrong, what we do. A true sin, living the most immoral life….or are we?
I would like to know who makes these definitions when writing the almighty book. No, not the Bible that some live faithfully through. I mean the dictionary. What gives one a right to put such a negative attachment to an honorable profession. Ok, maybe a little over the top calling it “honorable” but suffice to say that it is not dirty, degrading or immoral. Sex is natural and time spent together that is paid for seems only proper in my opinion.
“One who sells one's abilities, talent, or name for an unworthy purpose”. This one bewilders me. An unworthy purpose? What is so unworthy? I think I am paid in fair exchange for my services and time. And those fees have given more worth to my life. I have been able to experience things in the past year of escorting that financially I would have never been able to do without this business. Is it so wrong that I ask to be paid for what I do? Is it more honorable to just hand it out to everyone that asks for it and request nothing in return?
“A person considered as having compromised principles for personal gain”. Does it really seem so unrealistic to think that a woman may just enjoy being an escort? I mean, I really never did have to put much thought into doing what I do. My main concern was my safety. I am proud of what I do. I give to men and women what they yearn for in their lives. Adventure, companionship and passion. Don’t we all want that in our lives? I get out of this business what I put into it and that is why I do my best to put my all into it. And I do not compromise any principles to do it.
Escorting is an outlet to capture and release the essence of human sexuality. It is erotica and sensuality, a little on the risqué side perhaps but fun. It is safe in that there are no expectations but a wonderful time to be shared. Is that so wrong?
It is not to say that people don’t get hurt. Not all men and women participate in this business for the same reasons that I do. There is a line, a safety line that each party should clearly have and never cross. I never do, and I never get hurt, emotionally that is. Is there a physical danger to what I do? Absolutely. I cannot deny that and I have seen first hand just how scary it can be but I will save that for another entry. But that is a risk that I am willing to take. I do what I can to protect myself and because of that I have been able to enjoy most of my experiences in this business.
Before you condemn me, see my world through my eyes. Don’t feel pity for me for what I do but be happy that I experience all that I do. Do not pray for me to break free from this lifestyle but pray for yourself that you have a chance to set your sexuality free. And most importantly, don’t feel that because you are paying for my services that you have the right to treat me as you feel just. I respect myself and stand up for my chosen profession.
I kiss men in a way that some have never felt. They are my lover for the time that we are together. We experience together a most amazing connection. I give to them a renewed sense of themselves. They give to me the pleasure of having satisfied and at times satisfied myself. I leave smiling and so do they. I ask them about their day. Some have not been asked that by anyone that really cared in a long time. I offer them companionship and intimacy. Yes, it is paid for but that does not make it any less sincere.
Call me a whore, a prostitute or a slut and you condemn yourself as well. They are names, and while they are unpleasant they do not hurt me as their meanings are only attached to them by ignorance. I know I will never change how society views myself and others like me. But it will never make me any less proud of what I do or more importantly, who I am.
A prostitute.
A person considered sexually promiscuous.
A person considered as having compromised principles for personal gain.
Prostitute:
One who solicits and accepts payment for sex acts.
One who sells one's abilities, talent, or name for an unworthy purpose.
Slut:
A woman considered sexually promiscuous.
A woman prostitute
Courtesan:
A woman prostitute, especially one whose clients are members of a royal court or men of high social standing.
Escort:
One or more persons accompanying another to guide, protect, or show honor.
A man who is the companion of a woman, especially on a social occasion.
A person, often a prostitute, who is hired to spend time with another as a companion.
Sticks and stones may break my bones but names will never hurt me. It is the reality that when one thinks of a woman of my profession, the above comes to mind. We are demeaned, ridiculed and shrugged off by society. It is wrong, what we do. A true sin, living the most immoral life….or are we?
I would like to know who makes these definitions when writing the almighty book. No, not the Bible that some live faithfully through. I mean the dictionary. What gives one a right to put such a negative attachment to an honorable profession. Ok, maybe a little over the top calling it “honorable” but suffice to say that it is not dirty, degrading or immoral. Sex is natural and time spent together that is paid for seems only proper in my opinion.
“One who sells one's abilities, talent, or name for an unworthy purpose”. This one bewilders me. An unworthy purpose? What is so unworthy? I think I am paid in fair exchange for my services and time. And those fees have given more worth to my life. I have been able to experience things in the past year of escorting that financially I would have never been able to do without this business. Is it so wrong that I ask to be paid for what I do? Is it more honorable to just hand it out to everyone that asks for it and request nothing in return?
“A person considered as having compromised principles for personal gain”. Does it really seem so unrealistic to think that a woman may just enjoy being an escort? I mean, I really never did have to put much thought into doing what I do. My main concern was my safety. I am proud of what I do. I give to men and women what they yearn for in their lives. Adventure, companionship and passion. Don’t we all want that in our lives? I get out of this business what I put into it and that is why I do my best to put my all into it. And I do not compromise any principles to do it.
Escorting is an outlet to capture and release the essence of human sexuality. It is erotica and sensuality, a little on the risqué side perhaps but fun. It is safe in that there are no expectations but a wonderful time to be shared. Is that so wrong?
It is not to say that people don’t get hurt. Not all men and women participate in this business for the same reasons that I do. There is a line, a safety line that each party should clearly have and never cross. I never do, and I never get hurt, emotionally that is. Is there a physical danger to what I do? Absolutely. I cannot deny that and I have seen first hand just how scary it can be but I will save that for another entry. But that is a risk that I am willing to take. I do what I can to protect myself and because of that I have been able to enjoy most of my experiences in this business.
Before you condemn me, see my world through my eyes. Don’t feel pity for me for what I do but be happy that I experience all that I do. Do not pray for me to break free from this lifestyle but pray for yourself that you have a chance to set your sexuality free. And most importantly, don’t feel that because you are paying for my services that you have the right to treat me as you feel just. I respect myself and stand up for my chosen profession.
I kiss men in a way that some have never felt. They are my lover for the time that we are together. We experience together a most amazing connection. I give to them a renewed sense of themselves. They give to me the pleasure of having satisfied and at times satisfied myself. I leave smiling and so do they. I ask them about their day. Some have not been asked that by anyone that really cared in a long time. I offer them companionship and intimacy. Yes, it is paid for but that does not make it any less sincere.
Call me a whore, a prostitute or a slut and you condemn yourself as well. They are names, and while they are unpleasant they do not hurt me as their meanings are only attached to them by ignorance. I know I will never change how society views myself and others like me. But it will never make me any less proud of what I do or more importantly, who I am.
Friday, August 04, 2006
Cell phones
Cell phones, great technological advancement right? Yeah, they make life more simple now. A great convenience when you’re out and about. Men no longer need feel pressured to stop and ask for directions, they have their wives call someone. If you are running late or stuck in traffic, the phone is handily placed just above your visor. We all know of times that the cell phone has been a life saver and for some, a way of life. But I think we have to draw the line at expecting someone to be at your every whim simply because they have a cell phone.
I use my cell phone strictly for this business. My family and friends do not even know I own a cell phone. If they knew I owned one they would ask for the number. Somehow, my father listening to my voice message saying that I am unavailable for the evening does not seem to be appropriate. Just another way to keep my two lives very separate.
My cell phone is a key part to my business. I can leave detailed messages, informing all incoming calls of my availability for the coming days. It is a private number for me to use to return business calls outside of my home, protecting my personal life yet again. It is a great asset indeed and I rely on it heavily. But it is not attached to me 24/7. I do my best to maintain a proper balance between my personal life and this business. Allowing myself to be accessible to this business at all times is to me an intrusion on my life.
I respect that the gentlemen I see have tight schedules. I respect that when they have some unexpected free time they would like to call me. And I also respect that as a business owner I owe them a prompt reply as to booking an appointment. Unfortunately for some, the way I run my business does not make me as accessible as they would like me to be. My hours can be limited at the best of times and seldom free up at the last minute unless an appointment falls through. But I do have a life outside of this business and that life is my priority.
In saying that, I do not want it to seem as though I do take pride and responsibility for my escorting life because I truly do my best. But just as I would not wish to intrude on your personal time, please do not feel offended when I do not allow you to intrude on mine. I answer all messages as prompt as I can. When no details are given, just a name and a number I do not reply. If the message is derogatory or crude, again I will not reply. And if a gent is asking for a specific time and I do not get that message until the requested time has passed, I will not reply again. Aside from that, all calls are returned the day they are retrieved. I answer my phone when I am expecting a phone confirmation, aside from that I rely on emails and pm’s as my primary form of communication.
Yes, cell phones simplify life but believe it or not, way back 10 years ago…even escorts survived without them. They are a novelty, not a necessity. Whole some business owners may choose to use a cell phone to access their business while on personal time. I on the other hand use it to separate my business from my personal time. Again, it’s all about balance.
I use my cell phone strictly for this business. My family and friends do not even know I own a cell phone. If they knew I owned one they would ask for the number. Somehow, my father listening to my voice message saying that I am unavailable for the evening does not seem to be appropriate. Just another way to keep my two lives very separate.
My cell phone is a key part to my business. I can leave detailed messages, informing all incoming calls of my availability for the coming days. It is a private number for me to use to return business calls outside of my home, protecting my personal life yet again. It is a great asset indeed and I rely on it heavily. But it is not attached to me 24/7. I do my best to maintain a proper balance between my personal life and this business. Allowing myself to be accessible to this business at all times is to me an intrusion on my life.
I respect that the gentlemen I see have tight schedules. I respect that when they have some unexpected free time they would like to call me. And I also respect that as a business owner I owe them a prompt reply as to booking an appointment. Unfortunately for some, the way I run my business does not make me as accessible as they would like me to be. My hours can be limited at the best of times and seldom free up at the last minute unless an appointment falls through. But I do have a life outside of this business and that life is my priority.
In saying that, I do not want it to seem as though I do take pride and responsibility for my escorting life because I truly do my best. But just as I would not wish to intrude on your personal time, please do not feel offended when I do not allow you to intrude on mine. I answer all messages as prompt as I can. When no details are given, just a name and a number I do not reply. If the message is derogatory or crude, again I will not reply. And if a gent is asking for a specific time and I do not get that message until the requested time has passed, I will not reply again. Aside from that, all calls are returned the day they are retrieved. I answer my phone when I am expecting a phone confirmation, aside from that I rely on emails and pm’s as my primary form of communication.
Yes, cell phones simplify life but believe it or not, way back 10 years ago…even escorts survived without them. They are a novelty, not a necessity. Whole some business owners may choose to use a cell phone to access their business while on personal time. I on the other hand use it to separate my business from my personal time. Again, it’s all about balance.
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